Just for Sam...
Wednesday, 4 June 2008
Tuesday, 3 June 2008
Gem's Addiction
I am addicted to rice cakes.
Odd, because they don't taste of anything at all.
Its strange and faintly worrying.
Odd, because they don't taste of anything at all.
Its strange and faintly worrying.
Clearing Out The Crap!
OK - today has been a bizarre mixture of good and stressy!
When I got back to the house last night I discovered that Nick has buggered off for a few days / week / 2 weeks - he doesn't know how long. He won't say where he is, other than telling Gemima he was in a "sort of hospital like place" where he is being looked after.
Its his turn with Gemima this weekend but as he left a message on my voicemail this morning and mentioned being on a steroid drip, I am not leaving her with him even if he does come back in time.
The last time he came off a steroid drip was 22 November - see my blog on that day if you want to know how agressive he can get after coming off a steroid drip!
Anyhow - him being away for a while is good - I started tidying up yesterday but had a total blitz on the kitchen this evening and cleared out loads of crap. Have made a slight dent on the living room but that really is a total shite-hole and full of Nick's stuff and will probably take a good few days to clear. But its a start.
I figured that I might as well start preparing now in case I have to move... and if I end up not having to move, then I have a clutter-free house which will be easier to decorate properly!
Stressy because I am still having to deal with my financial crap and those who know me will know I hate dealing with my financial crap!
Also stressy because Keith went out tonight with Gloria, Sharon's Mum. I knew he was a bit anxious about it, which in turn made me anxious about it and I've sort of been tied up in knots for most of the afternoon. I was trying (not successfully) not to build emotional walls and run away and hide but it was difficult.
He called when he got back just before 10pm to say that actually he'd had a good time and there had been no agenda to her wanting to see him, which was a relief for him and therefore for me. He did sound happy and told me I can stop building my emotional walls up now!
He'll be glad to know I've fired the construction company for the moment then!
As far as the house goes, I think I might tackle my bedroom next. I am tempted to dismantle the bed and drag it down to the end of the garden ready for burning!
Now there's a nice thought. Might do that Thursday as I'm going out tomorrow night.
So - tonight I am getting stuff ready so I can take my housing application form to the council, collect some stuff from my solicitors and drop other stuff off to my solicitors, drop the kids at Mum's then meet Keith to go off to Hampton Court for 9pm to see Rufus.
Am SO looking forward to that. Will be lovely to be just the two of us for a while.
When I got back to the house last night I discovered that Nick has buggered off for a few days / week / 2 weeks - he doesn't know how long. He won't say where he is, other than telling Gemima he was in a "sort of hospital like place" where he is being looked after.
Its his turn with Gemima this weekend but as he left a message on my voicemail this morning and mentioned being on a steroid drip, I am not leaving her with him even if he does come back in time.
The last time he came off a steroid drip was 22 November - see my blog on that day if you want to know how agressive he can get after coming off a steroid drip!
Anyhow - him being away for a while is good - I started tidying up yesterday but had a total blitz on the kitchen this evening and cleared out loads of crap. Have made a slight dent on the living room but that really is a total shite-hole and full of Nick's stuff and will probably take a good few days to clear. But its a start.
I figured that I might as well start preparing now in case I have to move... and if I end up not having to move, then I have a clutter-free house which will be easier to decorate properly!
Stressy because I am still having to deal with my financial crap and those who know me will know I hate dealing with my financial crap!
Also stressy because Keith went out tonight with Gloria, Sharon's Mum. I knew he was a bit anxious about it, which in turn made me anxious about it and I've sort of been tied up in knots for most of the afternoon. I was trying (not successfully) not to build emotional walls and run away and hide but it was difficult.
He called when he got back just before 10pm to say that actually he'd had a good time and there had been no agenda to her wanting to see him, which was a relief for him and therefore for me. He did sound happy and told me I can stop building my emotional walls up now!
He'll be glad to know I've fired the construction company for the moment then!
As far as the house goes, I think I might tackle my bedroom next. I am tempted to dismantle the bed and drag it down to the end of the garden ready for burning!
Now there's a nice thought. Might do that Thursday as I'm going out tomorrow night.
So - tonight I am getting stuff ready so I can take my housing application form to the council, collect some stuff from my solicitors and drop other stuff off to my solicitors, drop the kids at Mum's then meet Keith to go off to Hampton Court for 9pm to see Rufus.
Am SO looking forward to that. Will be lovely to be just the two of us for a while.
Monday, 2 June 2008
Catch Up!!!
Oh God! I'm SUCH a slacker! I haven't blogged for ages!
Right - what has happened in my life since I last bothered my arse to blog about it...?
Actually lots and lots has happened. To the point where I don't know which way is up and my stress levels are through the roof.
Probably why I haven't wanted to write about it. Too much to cope with just living it!
So - a brief rundown of things that have happened in thelast week or so:
BastardCard:
Living up to their new name.
Didn't investigate and send me a final response letter as they were supposed to. Didn't resolve the issue by mid-march as they were supposed to.
No.
The fuckers sent the case off to a debt collection agency instead!
Needless to say I wrote them a shitty letter and copied it to the financial ombudsman and to the debt collectors. Was a bit angry - wrote an essay - sent off 11 pages of A4 to each!
Debt collection agency responded by apologising and I made a £50 contribution towards my actual bill so that the matter did not go to court (they had been demanding just over £150 in their letter).
Still to hear back from BastardCard. Watch this space!!
Divorce:
Nick is being a fucking shite.
No change there then!
He's told Gemima that he hates me and everyone in my family and that after the divorce is over he never wants to see any of us again. (Feeling is mutual I am sure!)
He has clearly forgotten that my family happen to be Gemima's family and that she will be upset by this.
Tosser!
He has also been doing his best to again persuade her to live with him and not me. Naturally I have explained that this is not a decision a 7-year-old has to make and that the courts will decide.
He has cancelled all the direct debits on the joint account - including utility bills and council tax! The only ones left open are mortgage and his life insurance. I have had to go pay off May's mortgage as I found out today that it wasn't paid! Hurrah! That's me skint for the month! Had to move mortgage payment date to 1st of the month too - so that's an extra £120-odd on top of next month's mortgage already.
Keith:
Is my rock and is as fabulous as ever. I don't know what I would do without him.
Really.
I don't.
I've had a great couple of weekends. The kids love being in SWF and they both really like Keith.
That's not a problem. The problem is the awful empty feeling I get when I have to leave SWF to come back to London. I hesitate to say come back home because the house in London doesn't feel like home. Not to any of us.
House:
Looks like I'll have to sell it. Brain fizzing - can't write any more about this!
General:
I miss Keith. I find it hard to sleep in my cold bed in the loft without him. I seem to have become used to cuddling up to him and nodding off. Its funny - I thought I would never want to share my sleeping space with anyone again - but I can't sleep properly anymore when he's not there.
*sigh*
That's about all my tired brain can remember for now. Time to attempt the sleep thing again methinks!
Right - what has happened in my life since I last bothered my arse to blog about it...?
Actually lots and lots has happened. To the point where I don't know which way is up and my stress levels are through the roof.
Probably why I haven't wanted to write about it. Too much to cope with just living it!
So - a brief rundown of things that have happened in thelast week or so:
BastardCard:
Living up to their new name.
Didn't investigate and send me a final response letter as they were supposed to. Didn't resolve the issue by mid-march as they were supposed to.
No.
The fuckers sent the case off to a debt collection agency instead!
Needless to say I wrote them a shitty letter and copied it to the financial ombudsman and to the debt collectors. Was a bit angry - wrote an essay - sent off 11 pages of A4 to each!
Debt collection agency responded by apologising and I made a £50 contribution towards my actual bill so that the matter did not go to court (they had been demanding just over £150 in their letter).
Still to hear back from BastardCard. Watch this space!!
Divorce:
Nick is being a fucking shite.
No change there then!
He's told Gemima that he hates me and everyone in my family and that after the divorce is over he never wants to see any of us again. (Feeling is mutual I am sure!)
He has clearly forgotten that my family happen to be Gemima's family and that she will be upset by this.
Tosser!
He has also been doing his best to again persuade her to live with him and not me. Naturally I have explained that this is not a decision a 7-year-old has to make and that the courts will decide.
He has cancelled all the direct debits on the joint account - including utility bills and council tax! The only ones left open are mortgage and his life insurance. I have had to go pay off May's mortgage as I found out today that it wasn't paid! Hurrah! That's me skint for the month! Had to move mortgage payment date to 1st of the month too - so that's an extra £120-odd on top of next month's mortgage already.
Keith:
Is my rock and is as fabulous as ever. I don't know what I would do without him.
Really.
I don't.
I've had a great couple of weekends. The kids love being in SWF and they both really like Keith.
That's not a problem. The problem is the awful empty feeling I get when I have to leave SWF to come back to London. I hesitate to say come back home because the house in London doesn't feel like home. Not to any of us.
House:
Looks like I'll have to sell it. Brain fizzing - can't write any more about this!
General:
- Work = busy and now complicated! Talk about steep learning curve!
- Car = taxed now. Finally! Insurance premium has now doubled since accident last year as lorry driver who parked in the back of my old Peugeot has still not paid out so I look like I have 0 years no claims bonus instead of 3 years! Grrr!
- Watched lots of TV at Keith's - a novelty still!
- Went to see Indiana Jones with Keith, Aaron, Gemima and Sam. Was fab and continued in the traditional Indiana Jones style!
I miss Keith. I find it hard to sleep in my cold bed in the loft without him. I seem to have become used to cuddling up to him and nodding off. Its funny - I thought I would never want to share my sleeping space with anyone again - but I can't sleep properly anymore when he's not there.
*sigh*
That's about all my tired brain can remember for now. Time to attempt the sleep thing again methinks!
Friday, 23 May 2008
Bangers & Massage
Good day at work today. Busy but felt like I'd done lots - which is great.
Did a job interview today with a prospective new support worker. Was a little nervous when I was told I'd have to do it with another member of staff rather than my manager but I got through it OK - I think!!
Malcolm, my old manager from LDT, came by this afternoon for a coffee and a chat with John, my current manager. It was lovely to see Malcolm again - its been a while. Mustn't leave it that long again.
Jamie dropped Aaron off to me at work and we headed off to SWF straight from there. Keith cooked. Bangers and Mash! Fantasic!! Haven't had that for AGES!
Have done something to my back - I think only pulled a muscle or have big stress knots - but whatever it is, it really hurts! Its just below my shoulder blades, which is a bit of a bugger when you're trying to do anything at all!
Fortunately Keith has magic hands and gave me a massage after dinner. It was bliss and I would have been happy for him to carry on for hours!
Finally nodded off (after giing in and taking painkillers) to Terry Pratchett's Wintersmith audio book. Was tired so only heard the first 10 minutes or so!
Did a job interview today with a prospective new support worker. Was a little nervous when I was told I'd have to do it with another member of staff rather than my manager but I got through it OK - I think!!
Malcolm, my old manager from LDT, came by this afternoon for a coffee and a chat with John, my current manager. It was lovely to see Malcolm again - its been a while. Mustn't leave it that long again.
Jamie dropped Aaron off to me at work and we headed off to SWF straight from there. Keith cooked. Bangers and Mash! Fantasic!! Haven't had that for AGES!
Have done something to my back - I think only pulled a muscle or have big stress knots - but whatever it is, it really hurts! Its just below my shoulder blades, which is a bit of a bugger when you're trying to do anything at all!
Fortunately Keith has magic hands and gave me a massage after dinner. It was bliss and I would have been happy for him to carry on for hours!
Finally nodded off (after giing in and taking painkillers) to Terry Pratchett's Wintersmith audio book. Was tired so only heard the first 10 minutes or so!
Karen Update
Spoke to Karen.
Her Dad's recovering but went throuh the mill to get there. Apparently he had a heart attack during the op and another one in recovery afterwards.
He was rushed off to St Thomas' Hospital in London and has to have another op on his heart tomorrow.
Poor Karen.
I remember that awful feeling and being in the hospital everyday when a parent is ill.
It's been 8 years since my Mum came home after spending almost a year in hospital but it really doesn't feel that long and she is definitely here on borrowed time.
My thoughts are with you Karen
Her Dad's recovering but went throuh the mill to get there. Apparently he had a heart attack during the op and another one in recovery afterwards.
He was rushed off to St Thomas' Hospital in London and has to have another op on his heart tomorrow.
Poor Karen.
I remember that awful feeling and being in the hospital everyday when a parent is ill.
It's been 8 years since my Mum came home after spending almost a year in hospital but it really doesn't feel that long and she is definitely here on borrowed time.
My thoughts are with you Karen
Thursday, 22 May 2008
Thinking of Karen
Had a text from my friend Karen. Keith and I were supposed to be going to her house for a cocktail party this weekend but she has cancelled.
I called to see why and she said her Dad was rushed to hospital today. They found a lump in his bowel which is likely to be cancerous and they have to operate to remove it asap.
The op is scheduled for tomorrow morning.
Keeping my fingers crossed.
Watch this space.
I called to see why and she said her Dad was rushed to hospital today. They found a lump in his bowel which is likely to be cancerous and they have to operate to remove it asap.
The op is scheduled for tomorrow morning.
Keeping my fingers crossed.
Watch this space.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
