Meh......................

Feeling really flat today. Kind of tired and washed out. And a bit sick. Don't feel like eating but made myself because I was getting nagged at by all and sundry.

One day of not having an appetite does not mean I have reinstated my former eating disorder people! I am not at risk of fading into nothing. At absolute best I have gone from a size 24 to a size 20 - or maybe an 18 at a push - in the past 3 months.

Still at home this evening. Would have gone to Keith's but quite apart from the fact that he is possibly getting a bit overwhelmed with his constant visitor and he had things to do tonight anyway, I need to spend some time with my girls. More so as Nick refuses to allow me to take Gemima with me to Keith's.

We were going to go and see Richard Hammond doing his book signing thing at Bluewater tomorrow - but its only on from 1-2 and the chances of getting anything signed in that timeframe.... slim to none I would have thought. So we're not going. We'll probably do some Christmas shopping or something. Or maybe I can buy some jeans as I have no sodding clothes that fit me any more - even those ones that were skin-tight and uncomfortable are now falling off me.

Gotta love the Stress Plan Diet...!

Good Grief

Nick and I actually had a civil conversation last night without me being shouted at or called names or accused of anything!

Might even have sorted out Christmas arrangements.

Remains to be seen whether it will be stuck to - but at least its a start.

Watch this space.

Fairweather Friends And All That

I was going to write a big ranting blog about a so-called friend of mine who has been a total cow and has deleted me from her friends list on facebook and blocked me over a picture of a pair of fluffy pink handcuffs which her boyfriend has accused me of sending him... only I didn't send them to him... I sent them to her.

I was going to write about how pissed off I am but you know what... I can't be arsed. After an evening of being shocked and then upset over it I came to the conclusion that even if we have known each other for 12 years, if she is prepared to end our friendship over a picture, then she was never a friend to start with and is no great loss.

She only ever phoned when she wanted something anyway - so I guess that is another burden off my shoulders if nothing else.

Fucking Fairweather Friends

Sophie's home!!

Good news at last!

Thought it would never happen on this blog, didn't you!!

Well, aha - you were wrong!

Yes - as the title says - Sophie is indeed back at home. She has, I believe, actually been discharged this time and shouldn't be back in until her op to remove the gallbladder.

At least - we hope!

Chrisfarce Lights

Well, its nearly Chrisfarce again and we have reached the time of year when usually sane people attempt to outdo each other in the who-can-make-the-house-look-the-tackiest competition. Each year it gets that little bit earlier and that little bit more nauseating.

I am sure that at some point I will wander about with my camera and take pics to post here. Until that time I shall continue to drive past with a look of combined revulsion and morbid fascination at the ridiculous display.

Grumble, grumble!!!!!

Living With An Emotional Pendulum

Nick's mood swings are getting worse. Its a fact.

He was fairly human this evening when I came home from work. Made me a coffee too - which is something he hasn't done in a while. Was almost surreal. Had a relatively normal conversation with no slagging off or nastiness. Is unusual to see Normal Nick make an appearance these days.

I put Gemima to bed. Told Nick I was going to help Karen pack as she is moving this weekend. No problems. He said "see you later then" and even switched on the porch light for me.

Got back.... Normal Nick had disappeared and the one that had taken his place was cycling between Hypochondriac Nick and Angry Nick. Very hard to tell which Nick I am dealing with these days. I know my moods can be changeable but I'm a gemini - its to be expected - and even I can't keep up with him!

He was all ready to go to sleep on the sofa when I walked through the front door. He'd been out having a fag in the garden and stunk out the living room with his nasty ashtray smell.

I listened to him moan about the cold, then about his backache, then about the fact that the sofa is hardly an orthopedic mattress (as he was laying down on it and pulling his blankets on).

I asked if he wanted more blankets and he replied that he would get too hot! After having been moaning about the cold.

I asked if he wanted me to turn off the wall lights, to which I received a grumbled unintelligible response. So I turned them off and got a grumble, so I turned them on again on dim and got another grumble, so I made the point of telling him that I cannot understand him when his face is under a blanket, to which he responded by lifting his head out of the blankets and saying in a very cross voice "I'm having a dizzy spell. I said I was having a dizzy spell." then after a few secnds said "Yes! Turn the lights off then", which I did - to which he said in a very sarcastic voice "Thanks! Thanks VERY much".

I was actually surprised at his sudden change of character so I didn't leave immediately and promptly got told to "piss off then". When I said "what was that?" he replied crossly, "Oh just go to bed!"

Nice. What a tosser. Yes - I know he was hinting that he should be able to have the bed but he didn't actually ask for it. Next time he can switch the lights off himself! Ingrate!

New Phone

My super fab and groovy phone is now alive with SatNav wizardry!

Software arrived in the post today along with a free 1gb memory card. Woohoo!!!

Now - if I can just get the damn stuff to run on this sodding PC!